Amazon Warriors: Episode Ten - His to Protect by Elena Aitken (Part Two)

We finish out His to Protect by discovering it was a lot shorter than we thought. Helicopter mysteries are solved, and we're both confused about who was a bear and who wasn't in some blackmail pictures. Ava has thoughts about the three-act structure and try-fail cycles, and Brynn isn't afraid to smash an iPad.
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From Amazon.com:

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When Harper Bentley’s life begins a death spiral, she does what any self respecting woman would do—she heads for the mountains. More specifically, Grizzly Ridge. A brand new—and very remote—lodge in the wilds of Montana. The last thing she expects to find there is deliciously sexy Axel Jackson, who is more than a little wild himself and reigniting feelings she’d long since buried.

From the moment he lays eyes on her, Axel knows Harper is more than just a guest at his lodge. Much more. Every bear shifter has a mate. She’s his. And whether his brothers believe in fated mates or not, nothing will keep Axel from what is his. But first he’ll need to convince Harper that what she’s feeling is more than lust. It’s fate.

TRANSCRIPT:

Ava: Yeah, and I'm not saying that a story has to [pause] precisely fit the three act structure. That [pause] doesn't matter. But, um, if you don't understand the promises you've made to the reader, then they'll feel [pause] ripped off at the end of the story, as I kind of felt in this case. 

Brynn: Yeah, I'm kind of just – the story – it was like it was complete but there wasn't a lot of detail or movement in the plot. 

A: Yeah, not much actually happened. 

B: Like you get from the beginning to the end, but it's a rather quick journey there [laughter]. 

A: Yeah, because it's a novella, you know? And typically when you write a story you have try-fail cycles [pause], you know. Where you attempt to reach you – the character attempts to reach their goal and fail, and that raises the stakes. So you're constantly raising the stakes until the climax, and then you have the falling action. And since the stakes weren't really being raised that much -- 

B: Yeah, here it's like – 

A: Um – 

B: Forward, success, Forward, success, Forward, success, you know? 

A: Exactly. [laughter] 

B: I mean, it could've become more complicated, like, maybe like [pause] him trying to convince her – I don't want to use the word convince, but you know – kind of woo her, I guess. 

A: Yeah. 

B: Rather than just flat out saying "hey, you're my mate," you know? 

A: Yeah, having a little romance. Go on a date, or something. Well, they're in the middle of nowhere, but, you know. 

B: Go for a hike. [laughter] 

A: Well, and, like I said, I haven't really read any romance, but when you watch like a rom-com, there's always the point in the story where [pause] they fight or argue and you think they're broken up forever, and, um, you don't have to think they're broken up forever, but they could argue about something very important. 

B: Yeah. 

A: Uh, or she and Nina could get in a fight over something. Or he and his brothers could have a fight that had actual consequences, because [pause] the fights he has with his brothers never come to anything, really. 

B: Yeah, it's just [pause] arguing. [laughter] 

A: I think this is sort of our final thoughts.  [laughter] 

B: It – it – it kinda really is, it kinda just [pause] moved into that. 

A: Yeah, it morphed into our final thoughts. I – I felt like the first half was way better than the second. 

B: The second half wasn't really a half. But yeah. [laughter] 

A: Yeah. Yeah, the first ten chapters that we read I really liked. I felt like the – obviously the story lost steam. We've already discussed that, but [pause] one of the problems I had also was that – besides like plot-wise – that Axel got more possessive, and not less. 

B: Yeah. 

A: Honestly, he didn't have much of a character arc. He just stayed the same possessive dude the whole time, and – you could tell that the author was trying to rein that in [pause], but couldn't quite do it. 

B: Yeah. 

A: But I don't really have anything else to say about it. Do you want to get to ratings? 

B: Yeah. 

A: Okay, cool. Um, what did you give this for editing? 

B: I mean, editing – I [pause] don't really know how to – I mean, I – I'd call it a three [pause] basically cause [pause] I don't know, it wasn't fantastic, there were some confusing bits, and [pause] it wasn't terrible. It was good, I mean – 

A: Average. I mean, three's average. 

B: Yeah, average, you know? 

A: Yeah, I gave it a four out of five. I didn't think it was that bad, other than, like, some weird words, and [pause] comma usage. Um, what did you give this on plot? 

B: Three as well, I mean [pause] overall I think it could have been really interesting, but there were spots where it just really fell flat, you know? 

A: Yeah, I also gave it a three out of five. 

B: It needed to be expanded, you know? 

A: Yeah. Yeah, it wasn't an – it didn't give you enough of what you wanted. 

B: Yeah. 

A: What did you give [pause] it on characterization? 

B: I mean [pause] this is kind of a tough one. I kinda have to go down to a [pause] a two on this, because nobody really had any personality. You didn't really learn much about them, other than [pause] Axel is angry and possessive, and Kade is grumpy, and Trent is evil, and there wasn't much – 

A: [laughs] 

B: – Depth to the characters. 

A: Yeah, it's – they're all pretty one-dimensional. I actually thought that the best character was Nina. Um – 

B: Yeah, she was the most interesting [laughs]. 

A: And I liked Harper fine, I feel like if she'd been fleshed out more, I would've liked her a lot. Uh, I gave it a three out of five. Uh, what did you give it on dialogue? 

B: Dialogue's a four, there wasn't really anything wrong with the dialogue. I mean, it was really corny in parts [pause], but – 

A: [laughs] 

B: But it – it made sense most of the time, you know? 

A: Yeah, it was good dialogue. I also docked a point for corniness. [laughter] 

B: [laughs] 

A: Especially, um [pause], this is obviously just a personal preference, um, he kept calling her, like, "babe" in sexy situations [pause], and for whatever reason, for me that's just a weird nickname when I throw out when I'm asking someone to take out the garbage. 

B: [laughs] 

A: So it didn't – didn’t fit for me personally [laughs]. So we've decided to add a new metric to this one. Or, more accurately, I decided to add a new metric and I'm dragging Brynn along. Um –" 

B: [laughs] 

A: But it's a romance novel that has sex in it, so I think that we should have [pause] as sexiness score for this one. Uh, so what did you give this one on sexiness? 

B: Again, a three. I mean [pause], he was all weird and possessive, and that really threw me off a lot, and then, like you said, there was a bunch of really awkward stuff, you know? [laughs] 

A: [laughs] I gave it a four out of five, because I think that taken outside of the rest of the story, the sex scenes were pretty well written. I do try to kind of separate these out from each other [pause], so that people with different [pause] preferences can like, decide what's a [pause] um, dealbreaker for them [laughs]. Um, but yeah, I have it a four out of five, which would bring my average to – 

B: Mine is three three two four three, so mine's a solid three. [laughs] 

A: Let me do some math, I gotta pull up my calculator app [laughs]. I can't do this one in my head, it's [pause] it's a weird one. Well, while you're doing that, yeah, mine was overall a three out of five. Overall the story was interesting, and I – I just wish that we got more depth to it. And I think it could be a five out of five book, if it simply had more depth to the characters, more depth to the plot, and [pause] that would make it a longer story, too. 

A: Yeah. 

B: The whole premise is interesting [pause] just [pause] short. 

A: Yeah, I – mine came out to a – a three-point-six, so I guess that rounds up to a four, which seems like [pause], too good? 

B: [laughs] 

A: Cause I was so unhappy with the end of the book. But I guess, like [pause], if you math it out, I liked the first then chapters out of twelve, so [laughs] maybe it does make sense. [laughs] 

B: Yeah. 

A: I guess that's a four out of five for me. 

B: All right, so what was your favorite part of the book? 

A: Uh, my favorite thing was that Harper was never ridiculed for wanting to have sex. I just feel like Trent could have shamed her a lot more – 

B: Yeah. 

A: – for having some fun sex, and he didn't, and I liked that a lot. 

B: I mean, my favorite thing is probably [pause] a person, and that would be like, just, all the stuff with Nina. Like, Nina [pause] saying, "hey we’re gonna go on this adventure," then going [pause], and like, just the whole kind of – the trip leading into them arriving there was really pretty cool. 

A: What if [pause] this book had been about [pause] Harper and Nina going to the lodge and falling in love with each other? 

B: That would be interesting. 

A: I would have liked that a lot. 

B: [laughs] 

A: [laughs] I think they have a good dynamic [laughs]. 

B: What was your least favorite thing? 

A: So, obvious – plotting aside, we're gonna leave that out, since that's not, like, a thing – Axel's possessiveness was bad, but also the part where it kept saying his dick was twitching [laughs]. 

B: [laughs] 

A: That was gross. But also, you know what I realized? I was editing the first episode and I realized they didn't [bleep] in that bathroom! 

B: That is a good point [laughs]. 

A: I was – 

B: You were making such a big deal out of it [laughs]. 

A: I was so disappointed. And maybe that's why I – I thought that the book should've been longer, because the scene I wanted wasn't in there [laughs]. 

B: Yeah, I mean, my – 

A: [continued laughter] 

B: – my least favorite thing was probably [pause] Axel was pretty creepy throughout parts of the book [laughs]. And that really threw me off. 

A: Yeah, I just – almost. That's the thing, right? That's the problem with, uh, this kind of book is that it had a lot of potential and then fell flat, and sometimes that's almost worse than just reading a crappy book. 

B: Oh, you um, you emailed me about the helicopter thing. In the first episode – 

A: Oh, right! I forgot. 

B: In the first episode, we were trying to figure out [pause] if a [pause] helicopter could fly from Billings to wherever Grizzly Ridge is, and Ava looked all this up. 

A: [laughs] I took myself to Google, because I can't help myself. So, um, let's see what I got here. [pause] There we go, helicopter answers. Um [laughs], so [pause] first I looked up the helicopter thing, the range of helicopters, and it seems [pause] like, uh, your standard passenger helicopter gets about 250 miles, uh, to a tank of fuel, so – some get even more, um, but we'll go with 250. 

Um, so the next thing I did was [pause] look up mountain ranges in [pause] Montana, and I found that there is a small mountain range called the Bear Tooth Mountains, and I was like "there is absolutely no way [pause] she didn't decide this bear lodge on Grizzly Ridge wouldn't be in the Bear Tooth Mountains." [laughs] Uh, so I figured out how fat that is from Billings, and it's, what, like sixty miles? So, plenty, a helicopter could get there easily. But then that begs the question; why didn't they just drive? Because – 

B: Because helicopters – 

A: There's – 

B: – are more exciting. 

A: – there's a highway that goes straight there. 

B: [laughs] 

A: [laughs] You're right, it's definitely that helicopters are more exciting [laughs]. 

B: I – I'm kind of disappointed that the Wolf Mountains are kind of too far to be where the werewolves are [laughs]. 

A: I know, bummer [laughs]. 

B: But maybe the wolves are in the Crazy Mountains, cause that's right next to the Bear Tooth Mountains. 

A: Maybe they also have a helicopter [laughs]. 

B: [laughs] But yeah, so I guess that's it. Do you have anything else to add? 

A: I'm good. 

B: Thank you for listening to Amazon Warriors. You can find us on Twitter @thebookwarriors, and you can email us at warriors (at) superfuntimes (dot) net. Next episode we'll be discussing Herbert West – Reanimator by H.P. Lovecraft.